Well I went to therapy, I told him everything...to a complete stranger and a man at that! Not that I don't like men but, I distrust most. I felt like a weight had been lifted from me. He didn't really ask any questions except what my immediate family was like, I just could not shut up! When I left, I felt better... like a weight had been lifted. The next morning I got up with the attitude of "I will live my life today and pay for it tomorrow" what the hell, you have pain either way.
I got up and tore my house apart with every intention that I am strong and I can what I want. One hour into it I had a complete melt down...It has finally sunk in I CANT do certain things. I called my daughter and her husband crying and they came over and spent hours cleaning up my mess. I worry everyone I love, my sister called during this and I told her I was fine, next thing I knew she was at my house because she was worried and I can't control my emotions.
The next day I was hurting, but it was my daughter birthday and I was taking her to Salt Lake to have her cards read...During this the lady handed me a book called "Theta Healing" she told me to read this book and one more and come back and see her when I was done. Weird ... I don't have a clue what that is....hmmm
I came home tonight tired and in a weird mood, I looked up my blog and found a comment on my last ranting...I love what they put...I cried, I needed that, I will pin that on my fridge! I tried to find this person but no one is there...would love to chat, please leave your real blog address sound like you have been in my shoes could use some new eyes. Thank you for the poem!
http://www.lifechallenges.org/door/stephen_levine.html
ReplyDeleteHere are some ideas to help you strengthen your spirituality in spite of your present pain and health challenges.
ReplyDeleteGo within yourself. Often people say that meditating for hours can help you to re-connect your spirit. If your body hurts or is physically limited, it may not be possible for you to sit on the floor and meditate. Sometimes a walking meditation is easier on the body because it also helps you to distract from the pain signals in your body. Simply enjoy your spiritual meditation with a comfortable walk around the block.
Go with the intention of finding something beautiful in nature that is thriving in spite of adversity. Examples that you could find could be:
A weed growing in the middle of someone’s front yard landscaped with rock.
A bunny rabbit that races across the road in the middle of traffic.
Plants and grass that sprout and grow in an area that previously burned with fire.
Or the ant that carries a piece of popcorn that is 100 times his size across the sidewalk.
There are many subtle examples.
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During your walk of distraction or walk of meditation, simply notice the beauty.
The one red flower in the gathering of all yellow flowers.
A ladybug on a blade of grass.
A bird collecting twigs, string, and whatever else to build a nest.
If your pain levels have eased a bit and your body can tolerate some stillness, then find a soft patch of grass and lay down. Enjoy the warmth of the sun. If there are clouds, then create pictures from the clouds. Do anything using the beauty of your surroundings to fill yourself up, ease the stress caused by pain, and hopefully feel stronger and renewed to face the challenges you are presently facing.
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On high pain days, going within can be difficult because you feel the painful sensations in your body. If your pain levels are too uncomfortable to sit quietly with yourself, then try a meditation that you listen to. The following are our favorites:
“Flowdreaming” by Summer Mcstravick
“The Healing Codes” by Ben Johnson and Alex Loyd
“Healing Meditations” by Bernie Siegel.
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Your computer can help you with meditation and re-connecting with your spirit. Places like Youtube.com provide great videos set to music and spiritual quotes. Enter what you are looking for in the search box. An example to type in the search box might be spiritual or meditation. Several videos will come up where you can view a meditation.
Another great place to learn more about spirituality is Hayhouse.com for books and cd’s and also Hayhouseradio.com for replays of spiritual talk shows on the radio.
Are you wanting to distract yourself from pain and also be inspired? Movies can be a wonderful way to take yourself away from how your body feels as well as inspire you. Spiritualcinemacircle.com offers movies that generally are not featured in regular movie theatres. They are thought provoking and inspiring. They are meaningful movies that will touch your heart.
Oh, Christy, It looks like you have been given some wonderful ideas that will surely help you find some comfort if not relief from your pain. I'm glad you didn't drop your blog when the response was slow. May God bless your search and your journey. I'll be around to see how you are managing. I continue to hold you in my prayers.
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